What Happens If My Ex Wants to Relocate With the Kids?

Following a divorce, the arrangements for child custody are designed to create a stable life for the child. Additionally, it's meant to create a meaningful relationship with both parents. Life changes, however, and sometimes one parent will want or need to relocate.

It might be for a new job, a new relationship, for family support or other reason. However, parental relocation can create an intense dispute between the custodial parent and the non-custodial parent.

In New York, relocation cases are complex. The court must balance both parents' rights. Yes, one parent has the right to move, but the other party has the right to maintain a close relationship with their child or children.

Typically, before the custodial parent can relocate, they must get approval from the court...and work with an attorney. An attorney can also consult on What happens if my spouse is self-employed?

If you are wondering "what happens if my ex wants to relocate with the kids?" keep reading to see how things are typically handled:

Understanding Parental Relocation After Divorce

In a divorce, relocation refers to one person's intention to move the children a significant distance from the other parent. This isn't like moving to a different town in the same county or city...this might be moving out of state, moving several hours away in New York State, or even moving out of the country. In these cases, the relocation will affect the custody schedule or visitation rights.

In New York, there is no fixed mileage rule that defines what counts as a relocation. Instead, courts evaluate whether or not the proposed relocation would make regular visitation difficult or change the child's relationship with the other parent.

If the move interferes with the non custodial parent's ability to see the child as outlined in the custody agreement, the relocating parent either needs to get consent from the other parent or permission from the court.

The Legal Standard: The Child's Best Interest

Under NY law, custody and visitation decisions always prioritize the best interest of the child and the child's quality of life. When one parent wants to relocate, the court doesn't automatically favor or deny the request. Instead, it looks at how the move will affect the child's emotional, educational, and social well being. All of these decisions are done on a case to case basis.

Factors Courts Consider When Considering a Proposed Move

New York courts look at a number of factors when determining whether or not a parent may relocated with the child or children. Some of the things that are considered include:

• The reason for the move: Is the relocating parent looking for a better job, more education, better family support, a new residence, or are they only doing it to limit the other parent's contact?

• The relationship between the child and each parent: The court will also look at how closely bonded the child is with both parents.

• Will the move ultimately impact the stability of the child?: The court will consider the child's routines, their friends, community ties, and school district.

• The impact on visitation rights and custody: If the relocation makes visitation difficult, it could weigh on approval.

• Can relationships be preserved?: Courts will also look at whether or not a new arrangement can create a plan for contact through extended visits, video calls, or travel arrangements.

• The child's preference: Older children often have a say in what happens, depending on their age and their maturity.

• The motives of the parents: Finally, the courts look at the motive behind the move. Is it a good faith move or is it malicious against the other parent.

All cases are unique, but the main thing that determines the final decision is the well-being of the child.

The Court Process for Requesting Relocation

When one parent wants to relocated, this is the general court process:

1. Negotiation Between Parents

If possible, the relocating parent should discuss the move with their ex. Oftentimes, when both parents agree, a simple modification to the custody agreement is possible, and the courts will approve the relocation quickly.

2. Filing a Petition for Relocation

If the other parent doesn't agree, the relocating parent must file a petition with family court seeking permission to move. This petition must explain the reasons for the move, the proposed new location, how the move will benefit the child, and a proposed plan for visitation for the other parent.

3. Court Hearing

If the parents can't agree, the court will hold a hearing where both sides offer evidence supporting their side. This includes testimony from parents, teachers, psychologists, or other experts.

4. Court Decision

The judge will make the final decision based on the best interests of the children.

When the Court May Approve Relocation

Courts are more likely to approve relocation in the following situations:

• The move shows a clear benefit to the child, such as a better school system or a safer community.

• The relocating parent has a legitimate reason like a new job, a remarriage, or a family support network.

• The non custodial parent has limited involvement or has been inconsistent in their parenting.

• The relocating parent proposes a reasonable plan for the child to maintain contact with the other parent, such as extended summer visits or weekly video chats.

However, even if the moving parent’s motives are genuine, the court may still deny relocation if it would severely disrupt the child’s bond with the other parent.

When the Court May Deny Relocation

A judge can deny relocation, too. Some of the reasons for this include:

• If it would harm the child's emotional development

• If the move is meant to take the child away from the other parent

• If regular contact or visitation isn't practical

• If it doesn't offer an advantage to the child's welfare

• Appears motivated by the relocating parent’s personal preferences rather than the child’s needs

In some cases, if the court determines that relocation is not in the child’s best interest, custody may be transferred to the other parent to prevent the move from happening.

Relocation and Joint Child Custody Arrangements

Relocation disputes can be complicated, but they are even more complicated when parents have both legal and physical custody. Major decisions must be made jointly.

Modifying Custody Orders Due to Relocation

When a move is approved, courts generally issue a modified custody order. This outlines new visitation schedules and plans. For instance:

• The non custodial parent might get extended visitation during school breaks

• Both parents might be required to have regular video calls when with the other parent

• The relocating parent may have to pay all of the transportation costs for the child to see the other parent

If the relocation is denied, and the parent moves anyway, the court might modify custody and grant it to the noncustodial parent who isn't moving.

What to Do If Your Ex Wants to Relocate

If you learnt that your ex wants to move and take the children, taking quick and strategic action is imperative.

1. Do Not Agree Without Legal Counsel

Even if the move seems like it is a reasonable one, it's always best to talk to an attorney before you consent. An attorney can explain how the move might affect your custody rights. They can also advise on What happens if I want to change my name after divorce?

2. Review the Custody Order

Most custody orders include some type of provision about relocation or out-of-state travel. If the other parent violates the terms, they could be found to be in contempt of court.

3. File an Objection Promptly

If you oppose the move, you can file an objection with the family court. The court will schedule a hearing to evaluate the situation.

4. Gather Evidence

Evidence like the child's school performance, community involvement, and the child's relationship with each parent can show how the move might affect the child.

5. Stay Focused on the Child’s Needs

Judges often respond best to the parent who prioritizes the child's well-being over their conflict with their ex. By showing that you are willing to cooperate and continue to co-parent will often strengthen your credibility.

Consequences of Relocating Without Permission

If a parent chooses to relocate without getting approval, there are serious consequences:

• The court might order the child to be returned to the area immediately.

• The moving parent can be found in contempt of court, facing fines or other penalties.

• Custody may be transferred to the non-moving parent.

• The court may impose restrictions on future travel or decision-making authority.

It is always better to seek permission from the court, even if you have primary custody, as court approval is likely required. For more information, Albany child custody lawyers may be able to help.

The Role of a Family Law Attorney

Relocation cases often require a lot of evidence, negotiation, and an understanding of custody laws in New York. When you work with a family law attorney, they will help with:

• Filing petitions or objections against the move

• Present evidence showing that it's best for the child's life to stay or go

• Negotiate a revised plan for custody

• Represent clients in mediation or hearings.

Whether seeking permission to relocate or fighting to maintain contact, working with an experienced Albany family law attorney can make all the difference. Skilled legal guidance ensures that every decision — and every move — supports what matters most: the child’s happiness, security, and future.

If you are ready to move with your child, or you don't want your ex to take your child out of state or far away, reach out to Divorce & Family Legal, LLC.